Happy Fourth of July!

I was sitting by the last fire pit we'll have at Ellsworth Air Force Base just now thinking about our three years here.  Every now and then I truly love being a psychologist!  I see psychological concepts every day of my life--today is no exception!  I find myself experiencing a classic case of cognitive dissonance: I am sad to see this chapter of our lives end yet my actions suggest that I am excited to board the plane bound for Japan on Tuesday morning!  My thoughts and my actions do not match and in true Festinger fashion, one of the two must change!  Moving is a fact of military life so I'm pretty sure my thoughts will ultimately match my behaviors.  *smile*  

It is the fourth of July and I can see fireworks lighting up the night's sky.  I was reminded of a speech I gave in 2011 at the kickoff of the Military Spouse Appreciation Day festivities here on base and thought it would be a fitting addition to this blog.  After I gave the speech, I was asked to modify it for publication. So here it is, my tribute to my fellow military spouses and the flag I am so proud to help hold high.

We just finished celebrating military spouse appreciation day and spouses were the focus of activities all over the base.  While it was an amazing day (who doesn’t like to be appreciated now and then!), I likely speak for us all when I say I am a military spouse not for what I can be recognized or appreciated for, but for love.  Our active duty spouses volunteer to put their uniform on every morning and in a very real way we volunteer to accept all that goes along with that.  I want to tell you a quick story that also centers on appreciation, and it’s one I think has a direct bearing on our lives as military spouses.   

At the turn of the 19^th Century, America was deep into what we now think of as the War of 1812.  The British burned our capitol, captured a few notable prisoners, and had their sights set on seizing control of the Port of Baltimore.  A young lawyer named Frances Scott Key was sent to Baltimore to negotiate for the release of the prisoners and although he was successful, found himself sequestered onboard one of the British ships.  You see he overheard plans the British were making to attack Fort McHenry later that night. 

In Baltimore, the defenders of Ft McHenry had been expecting an attack for some time.  Major Armistead, the commander of Ft. McHenry, commissioned Mary Pickersgill to sew a flag large enough to be seen by the British ships from a distance. That first flag consisted of 15 white starts on a blue field, along with 8 red stripes and 7 white stripes.  It measured 30 feet high and 42 feet long. That’s just about half the size of a standard movie screen.  The only place large enough to lay it out and sew it was in the warehouse of the local brewery where Mary worked every night for a week. It was finished on September 12, 1814.  On the night of September 13^th, the battle began.  Major Armistead refused to surrender and ordered men to do whatever it took to guarantee the flag never touched the ground.  It was to remain constantly visible to the British out at sea.

Frances Scott Key had a grandstand seat out on the Bay from the safety of that British ship, but all he could do was watch.  It was a sight to behold; the British had a new type of rocket that once launched streaked red through the sky and exploded into tiny fragments upon impact. All night long these bombs lit up the sky.  One shell made a direct hit on the flag and tore out a few of the stars—a British gunner leaned over and told Key to watch and see—they’d all be gone by morning.   As the night wore on fog rolled in, but even when visibility was poor, the flag could be seen standing tall illuminated by those bursting bombs. At some point in the predawn, the shelling stopped, the air was still, and the fog was thick.  But then, at the first light of dawn, there she was!  The flag was battered and it was torn but it stood tall flying proudly in the sky supported by the bodies of the soldiers who had given their lives to ensure it remained upright.  The experience moved Key so deeply that he wrote a poem he entitled the Defense of Fort McHenry:

O! say can you see, by the dawn's early light,

What so proudly we hail'd at the twilight's last gleaming,

Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,

O'er the ramparts we watch'd, were so gallantly streaming?

And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,

Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there --

O! say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave

O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave?

On the shore, dimly seen through the mists of the deep,

Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,

What is that which the breeze o'er the towering steep,

As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?

Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,

In full glory reflected now shines on the stream --

'Tis the star-spangled banner, O! long may it wave

O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave.

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore

That the havock of war and the battle's confusion

A home and a country should leave us no more?

Their blood has wash'd out their foul foot-steps' pollution,

No refuge could save the hireling and slave,

From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave;

And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave

O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave.

O! thus be it ever when freemen shall stand

Between their lov'd home, and the war's desolation,

Blest with vict'ry and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land

Praise the power that hath made and preserv'd us a nation!

Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,

And this be our motto -- "In God is our trust!"

And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave

O'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave.

Our country is once again at war.  We don’t read about it in the history books; we live it.  Today, our flag has 50 stars, along with 7 red stripes and 6 white stripes and it’s the men and women we love who ensure it never touches the ground.  Surrender isn’t an option today any more than it was for Major Armistead and the soldiers of Fort McHenry.  But our husbands and wives don’t bear the weight of the flag alone.  We are right there next to them making sure that our flag, no matter how battered and torn, waves proudly in the sky.  Every missed dinner and family plan ruined by weekend duty or that TDY that suddenly appeared lay at the base of the flag.  Every PCS when we leave friends behind and our favorite piece of furniture arrives broken lay at the base of the flag. Every home repair we make on our own, because we all know nothing breaks ‘till their gone, lay at the base of the flag. Every second spent separated by yet another deployment lay at the base of the flag.  We sacrifice a piece of ourselves each and every day to ensure that our flag never touches the ground.  Our national anthem isn’t an annoying interruption to our evenings, nor is it a formality to endure before the “real fun” begins.  It is a reminder that everything we face as military spouses matters.  What we do, day in and day out, often without conscious thought, is noticed and it is appreciated.  When we hear our national anthem we should all stand a little taller and take pride in the knowledge that we play a vital role in ensuring that our star spangled banner continues to wave o’er the land of the free and the home of the brave. 

 "Old Glory"

Displayed at Hickam AFB.  This is the flag that was flying on Dec. 7, 1941--you can see where it's been sewn back together between the stars.  Another round of bombs on another day filled with smoke couldn't knock Old Glory down!